I’ve known from a young age I wanted to be a mother and have 3-5 children, on days like this I am glad I stopped at 3!
I am a pretty laid back mother when it comes to what I allow, I’m also not a believer in shouting at kids, I will raise my voice and change my tone but shouting in my opinion just encourages them to shout (believe me it takes a lot of restraint to NOT shout!).
Tonight the youngest child decided to throw a tantrum at bedtime over a drawing her sisters friend had made, said child is normally very sweet and well behaved but every few months she has a horrendous tantrum which involves screaming, hitting and crying.
In recent months I’ve became better at handling negative behavior but when I am ill and in a lot of pain I have a very short fuse.
Luckily my painkillers are kicking in now and I feel slightly calmer.
In some respects I am lucky, my children are never in trouble at school and are pretty sensible and grounded but they do argue A LOT when they are in the house, life in here consists of lots of shouting between them with a couple of wallops and the odd kick too, but outside the house or when visitors are here they are very good!
At the end of the day the times you see all those firsts or when they wrap their arms around you and tell you they love you make it all worth it 🙂
Some people say I put my kids first too much, it was one of the reasons I separated with my husband, because he felt I always put them first, but it’s an instinct for me, it would feel wrong to have it any other way.
I’m so glad I’ve started a career for myself again after being a stay at home mum for over 8 years, because otherwise I think I would feel lost when the kids grow up and move out. Saying that even as a stay at home mum I did a night class, an voluntary job and an Open University course.
I have been thinking recently though that I do need to find more of “me”, get some hobbies & take some time for myself even if it’s just spending that spare hour painting my nails instead of doing something kid/house related task.
I love my children more than words can describe, I also tell them this every day and hug them, not every parent is physically and emotionally affectionate, some just assume their child will know they love them, but that itself is not always true either ❤